"How do you wipe your butt" and other stupid things people say to me

Here is a list of stupid questions/remarks people have said to me. I know that people say there are no such things as stupid questions... for those people I'll sugar coat it and call them "inappropriate questions".

• "How do you wipe your butt?" - I believe that this question really shows the cruelty and lack of empathy one has for human beings. The best part of the question has always been the sly smirk and giggle that follows. I am so happy you are thrilled with yourself to ask such a question. Kudos to you.  Maybe next time I should invite that person to watch so that they can sleep better at night because apparently the question is so imperative to their well being.   
• "Your child is so beautiful!! You know all things considered..." :::staring at my arms:::
• "You do really well for yourself, don't you? Good job! It's good to see you out." - Um... Thanks?! Did I not get the memo where I was supposed to stay in the tower and ring the bells? Oh.. my bad. (I got this one from a random cashier at Costco.)
• "Is it contagious?"
• "I'd date you but I'd be embarrassed. My friends wouldn't understand."- Trust me, sugar. If you aren't man enough to follow your heart and not your friends, I don't want you. 
• ...and the list goes on.

Now, before I seem like a bitter soul, let me just say this... I am aware that most comments that drive me bonkers are people's way to either make themselves feel less awkward or they truly believe in their hearts that what they are saying is sweet and thoughtful... possibly having poor communicative skills. I have learned to deal with such ignorance my whole life and I plan on having to deal with it for the rest of my life. I know that Aria will most likely have to deal with it as well and that makes me sad.

I am hoping that bringing this to light, people may try harder to be aware of what comes out of their mouths. Everyone is different, yet we are all the same. We all feel. Let's treat each other with kindness and compassion. And I will make it a point to try not to be a smart ass when someone fails to remember their compassion.